Tuesday 30 November 2010

We have snow :D

I'm smiling so much. I love snow with an amazingly childish passion. As I sit here in my quiet bedroom with the pup pressed against my legs I relish the blue glow on my window panes.
The snow is just a light dusting casting it's magical spell on the World, turning mundane into glamour.

I feel so happy and peaceful and so grateful that the glums have left me for now. Hopefully I can keep them at bay with a bit of realistic thinking. I can't do everything I set myself and it's early days, so I need to be gentle with myself.

I have a slightly tricky journey to get the children to school, with a rather wicked hill to negotiate. If all goes well I'll stop off at the Lake and take some photos. Although there's a strong chance that the other side of the hill will be clear of snow as they seem to have their own micro climate in that town! Either way, I'll take lots of photos to share with you later.

Stay safe and have a wonderful day everyone.

ps. I know that snow can be dangerous and isn't to everyones liking, but in my childish way I just block those thoughts, so, sorry to those of you who don't relish it the way I do!

Monday 29 November 2010

Thank you.

Thank you so much sweet friends for your kind words of support. They reach out and help me more than I can say.




Our duvet day turned out better than could have been hoped for. I ignored the housework and snuggled with the pup and read blogs and books and roared with laughter at French and Saunders on You Tube. Moomin was laughing so hard at the Bjork sketch, well, so was I to be honest :D The children played games and I kept them plied with hot drinks and lemsips.

Later I took a trip to the field and fed the ponies and took warm, milky rice and crackers to the chickens who were most pleased. Standing under a beautiful wintry sky was a balm and I took the time to savour the peace. It was truly heavenly.

Back to a roast dinner and an amazing movie (above) while I did the ironing and sorted school uniforms. The movie was called Origin and is in the Manga style, about trees and the destruction of the Earth. It has a strong environmental message as many of the Japanese films of this genre do and I totally loved it. Not to everyones taste though, so don't buy it just because I love it :D

Just a little picture I took last week while walking Manchee in the woods. He truly is a blue puppy :D He's definitely on the mend now and so will need a good walking routine to get him (and me) into shape :D I love the curve of his back and belly and boy can he run, he's like a rocket!

Time to heal.

Some weeks feel like a bigger struggle than others and this last week was one of those. Just as one area of life settles another becomes a trial!

My mind has been dealing with this in the form of some terrible nightmares, one of which was so awful that I took the pup into bed with me to calm my shaking. He thought it was great and in the back of my mind I thought 'rod for my own back'. Not so though. The next night he settled on his own bed and slept right through again. What a fantastic pup :D

I'm spending such a lot of time thinking and processing what has happened that I don't want to go on about it here, but find little else to share, so please forgive me for the infrequent posts.

The children have been laid low with another cold and my body seems filled with aches and pains, so as today is an inset day at school, I've declared it a duvet day. We will snuggle and build our strength while a roast dinner cooks itself in the oven. The pup will enjoy the rest too as he was very sick last night after scoffing something dodgy in the garden!!!

Sunday 21 November 2010

Puppy.

The pup is growing and has been for his first walks this week. It's been great taking him and watching his excitement at all the new smells. A very short walk along the road takes an eternity as he has to stop and investigate everything in his path. A quick dash after some swirling leaves takes him into a neighbours hedge, where he finds the scent of other dogs, cats and yes, SQUIRRELS!!!

I let him amble and sniff to acquaint himself with his surroundings, to know what his territory smells like. If, heaven forbid, that he should find himself lost, these are the smells to guide him home. Important days for him. Although, I have also taken the precaution of having him microchipped, so he'll be brought back to us eventually should he run off.



I've also been pottering and clearing up the house. Doing a little decorating and feeling most unwell during the process. I wonder if this exhaustion is simply due to stress, although the children have been unwell this week so maybe there's more to it than that!

I have a slow roast lamb curry in the oven, and a little glass of whiskey waiting for me tonight, so that will set me up for a relaxing evening :D

Sunday 14 November 2010

Did I think it would be easy???

A few comforting pictures first!!!

Friday night is traditionally pizza night in this household and this week I tried a slightly wetter bread mixture. Well, it kind of exploded the dough and I had enough to make 3 very big pizzas.



Two for supper and one for the freezer.



They were oh so delicious :D



Now for the grumble, but don't worry, it's only a little one. On that day when my marriage collapsed, so did my dreams and hopes for the future. I never intended for it to end, but now that it has, I'm guarding my peace and quiet as much as possible and every intrusion feels magnified. A weekend of tears and upset has left me exhausted, but thank goodness for my wonderful children and my darling puppy love :D I think maybe that I had thought it would be easier than this!



I'm trying to stay positive and taking each day at a time. I have the Secret and will give thanks for all the special people and wonderful things in the World. I have a lovely joint of pork roasting in the oven, the veggies are prepared and waiting and tonight will be spent writing letters and doing a little sewing :D

Saturday 13 November 2010

Yarrow Tales.



A new blog name and a new beginning. I don't want to be hiding any more and feeling like I'm in retreat. I need to begin again and spread my wings as a new part of my journey unfolds. However, this blog will still be left off my profile for most of the time, as I don't want certain family members reading about my new life!

So won't you join me as I discover who I am and where I'm going? I think it could be interesting :D

Thursday 11 November 2010

Amazing.

I watched the DVD of the Secret and found it to be amazing. So many ideas and thoughts in my head about giving and recieving the bounty of the Universe.

Being a Reiki Master, the concept is not new to me but it's good to have the message confirmed all the same. It's also worth remembering that the Universe loves balance and if we give of our time and energy then we are able to enjoy the fruits that our World has to offer.

I've been thanking the Universe for my blessings and have only been focussing on positive thoughts. Already it seems to be working as last night, my car broke down in a nearby town. There was no one at all that I could call and I was stranded with Moomin. Out of options I asked for an Angel to help me. We sat in the car for a couple of minutes, and I was just deciding to go in search of a garage when a parent of one of dd's friend's approached and asked if I was ok and that she had jump leads in her car! It's worth pointing out, that this is someone I've never actually met before, and she just noticed that we hadn't left for home when everyone else did. A shocking coincidence maybe??? Well, we got home safely albeit a bit shaken and now I'm left wondering....

The book of the Secret arrived today, and I can see why some people might get the wrong impression. Clearly this format isn't to everyone's way of thinking, but the root idea remains true. How many times have we heard these sayings? 'What goes around, comes around' 'Do as you would be done by' and 'you reap what you sow'. This book is just another way of interpreting those ideals. Agreed, it's dressed up in a new set of clothes and fancy ones at that, but the concept is the same.

So every day I thank the Universe for my blessings, I focus clearly on what I want to achieve and I hope to spread a little happiness and optimism while I'm at it :D

Tuesday 9 November 2010

The return of normality and the Secret.

Well, I'd been told many times that puppies can be darned hard work and just like having a new baby in the house, but until I experienced it for myself, I wasn't prepared for how demanding it is. Thankfully, I have a good little chap who sleeps a lot and has learned quickly the words 'wee wee' means to head out to the garden.

After being with us for two weeks, he is now settling into a routine and we can all get back to a semblance of normal life. I'm even getting a few decent hours sleep, as puppies hate to be alone at night and don't see the point of wasting great lengths of time flat out asleep, unless it's sandwiched between meals and trips to the garden! Thankfully, Manchee has been persuaded that I actually like to sleep for a long time when it's dark and in return, he gets to sleep beside my bed with a hot water bottle!

As life begins to settle again, I'm finding now that other matters are pressing me for their attention. I'm clever aren't I? I've been distracting myself from dealing with them by having the more pressing issues with the puppy, but no more. I have to think ahead and decide where I'm going and what I want. A series of unconnected coincidences have led me to this book and DVD - The Secret. http://www.thesecret.tv/index.html


Image from Amazon

It's an interesting concept, and one that I've read about before, how this book differs from others remains to be seen. Is it the answer? well, I'll keep you posted, or check it out for yourself. I'll be interested to hear from you if you've read it or have any comments.


Tuesday 2 November 2010

A very new month.

I've been reading back over my posts for the last month and it seems that my life has changed so much in such a short space of time. My hopes and plans have been turned on their head and I'm facing a whole new road ahead of me. As the new month begins, so does a new phase in my life.

It's been three weeks since my husband moved out and I've been dealing with so much loss, his and mine. We are still friends at the moment, but I cannot see beyond our immediate problems and how they will change us as time progresses. I know he's hoping for a reconciliation but only time and the Universe knows the answer to that one.

Something I do know though, is that I feel wholly supported by the Universe. It's a strange thing to say, I know, and some people may call this feeling faith in God or Buddha or Gaia, but whatever name you give it, it's bigger than my understanding and I feel held and comforted. On the way to a meeting tonight, I thanked the Universe and a great swell of leaves lifted and twirled on the road ahead. It felt like an anwer and my heart swelled with it.